In your twenties and still don't have your life figured out? Read this!

So you're done with University/College, you've even gone a step further and are on course for a Masters degree, but you still have no clue what you want to do afterwards? Fear not, you're not alone.

I know this because I've met people who are in their twenties and are not sure what they want to do. Some of them do have dreams of what they'll like to do, but the world stage doesn't seem to be set for them to make their grand entrance just yet. They are constantly faced with the fears and possibility of never achieving those dreams. As a matter of fact, the dreams seem so distant now that the likelihood of it being fulfilled in this lifetime seems almost non-existent.

In fact, let's take a step back, what if you don't even have a clue what you want to do at all and maybe you never have. You're reading about those who have dreams which seem so distant and you're thinking to yourself "I don't even have that". The future seems so bleak and the constant "so what's next?" you get asked every other day isn't helping matters, what do you do? I mean, what parent would like to hear that their  22 year old son is still clueless on what he wants to do with his life ; so you mumble something along the lines of  "I would like to start a career in investment banking'. But deep down, you know it's all lies.

So if that's you, here are my top five tips for what to do when you're in your twenties and you still don't have your life figured out.

1. Understand that you're not alone- You and I are certainly not the only ones who haven't got their whole  lives figured out yet. I know this because I've met other people like us and there are many more we are yet to meet. There are also people who are chasing jobs or are already in jobs/businesses they know they don't even want. It's not the life they want to live, but they've decided to make do (which is great, provided you don't settle in it permanently).

2. Stop beating yourself up over it- It's frustrating, I know. In fact, it's so embarrassing that you even find it difficult to admit it to yourself. You've spent all these time studying, trying to grow and mature and yet, it seems like you have nothing to show for it. It's okay, stop putting so much pressure on yourself. The fact that you finished with the best grades and attended the best educational institutions does not automatically translate to having your life figured out. Rather than beating yourself up, why not take the time to get to know yourself- your gifts, your talents, your likes/dislikes? Isn't that better use of time?

3. Pray- This is perhaps the best tip I can give you. Pray without ceasing, pray tirelessly, pray and pray again. Okay, I think I've repeated the word 'pray'enough, so I'll stop now..LOL. Here's the thing, God created you, knows you best and has a plan for your life. Yes, He does. The earlier you believe that, the earlier you can start your journey into a purpose-filled life. Even if you feel like you've wasted time at jobs you hate or studying for degrees you didn't enjoy, God can and will use those experiences and knowledge for your good. He's an expert at making something out of nothing.

4. Trust God- As you pray and God begins to reveal His purpose for your life and as you begin to have dreams (both day dreams and night dreams) about your ideal future, trust God. They may seem so big, actually they will seem so big that your mind can't comprehend how they will become realities, just trust God. Leave the 'how' to Him. Also, as you pray, understand that you may not receive the full picture, just begin to work on what He is already revealing to you and trust in Him to direct your paths.

5. Have fun and enjoy the 'now'- This is so vital. I don't want you to fall into the trap (or remain in the
trap) of those who are always looking forward to the future hence, fail to enjoy the now. Go out, have fun, meet people, read books, go on holidays (if you can afford it of course :D) and just genuinely have fun. Do whatever excites you and enjoy this present moment whilst planning for the future.

I know for fact that the 'twenties period/fresh out of uni' season of our lives can be quite daunting, exciting and anxiety-filled all at the same time. But I hope that with these few tips, you will be able to make the best out of it. Remember to take it one-step at a time, work with what you have now and stop building castles in the air (this in no way implies that you should not have faith).

Thanks for reading.


  1. This is a great post and much needed for me! I really feel like I'm running out of time to sort my life out lol and have been through all sorts of career choices But I'm going to keep this post as a reminder to relax :)

    Tomi (

  2. Thank God am not alone.

  3. I'm glad you both enjoyed and learnt from it.
    Thanks for stopping by :)

  4. Wow... This line made so much sense to me, and I connected with it immediately

    ""...... The fact that you finished with the best grades and attended the best educational institutions does not automatically translate to having your life figured out......""

    You see ehn Tomi, life is teaching me that School is a total different ball game from Life outside here oh. I wish i could say that since graduating in 2012, life has been great, but trust me, its been as hard as hell. I have had to make crazy decisions, had to cry sometimes, Faced Disappointments, been stabbed in the back, etc. But once i learnt to live a day at a time, and trust GOD, and be thankful to him, plus as you said; Enjoy the present and stopped building castles in the air, Life started to get better. :)

    Tomi, life is a bloody crazy place, and Life after graduation is even harder, but oh Well, we cant quit.

    Sadly, I dream a lot. so i have these very BIG dreams that are all over the place, I know what I want, but i dont really know what I want it for. I am still Pursuing Happiness, and in search of my Purpose, and like i have learnt, GOD'S Blue print for our lives, and the implementation of that Blueprint (no matter what life throws at us, or how Young and Confused we are) is as sure as the last Breath of air we just took. It will come to past no matter what. Cheers.

  5. Lovely post Tomi...being in my 20s, this is how I feel like now. Especially with the disappointments i've experienced lately...I'm trusting God because I know He has great plans for me and created me for a purpose.

    Its good to know I'm not alone!!

    I uploaded your short story on my blog, pls feel free to reply the comments, xx

  6. Thank you both for reading and thanks for your comments.
    @ Duru, exactly, that's the key Trust God. It takes a lot to trust God, especially when the circumstances and situations we face make it seem as though He's so far away or not with us, but His Word makes us realise He is with us always.

    @Feyi, spot on as well- trusting God because He has great plans for your life.

  7. It all begins wiv God. In d beginning was d word....Looking unto Jesus the Author and finisher.... So I quite agree wiv dat prayer part. Going to Him in prayer saves u d stress of d Israelites journey. Tank u once again Tomi.

    1. Thank you very much for reading Bito. Yes, prayer is very key and prayer certainly works.

  8. This was a great read Tomi. Thanks.

  9. This is the first time I'm reading your blog Tomi and this post couldn't have come at a better time. I think one of the biggest problems is that social conditioning has dictated that we have it all figured out in school and worse of, stick to that supposed path throughout life. So when we find ourselves lost, we feel ashamed. If there's anything I've learned over the past 10 months, it is that not having it all figured out is actually a blessing. Try out different things and get to truly know least that's what I'm trying to do. School is school, but life....hmmm.

    Thanks for the post.

    It's Hauwa O, your bestie before before.


    1. Hauwa!!!

      This is the first time you're reading my blog? I cannot believe

      Exactly, it's a great time to get to know ourselves. I mean it's great if one is able to do this whilst in secondary school or University, but if that isn't the case, not a problem. Better late than never! It will be so much worse to realise 10 years down the line the the life you're living isn't a path you would have chosen for yourself and you're just living out society's expectation of you.

      But yes, thanks for reading bestie before before :)




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